Dear Jackson,

First of all, let me start by saying how much I love you! I love you more than words can ever express, and I sincerely hope, that one day you have a beautiful little boy (or girl) of your own who steals your heart the way you have stolen mine. However, I also hope that the same precious child demonstrates the completely unreasonable behavior that you demonstrate when he or she is sick just like you do. I hope that he/she kicks and screams and tells you that you can't shower, or eat, or change your clothes, or go the bathroom, or give him/her medicine, etc, etc, etc until he/she is ready for you to. I hope that he or she lays on a bed screaming, "I am not tired. I am not tired. I am not tired." while looking at you with red rimmed, sick, sad eyes or "I am not crying. I am not being ugly." with the same sad expression. I hope that one minute he/she is screaming for you not to touch them and the next, crying because you are not holding him/her.

Yes, this is the way you have behaved all week while at Granna's house. And while I feel genuinely bad for you because it is obvious how utterly miserable you feel and I know that the behavior is a direct result of the miserableness, I am also so tired of the fits and the fights. You have been sick on and off for two weeks, but his week was FAR worse than last week. You started Monday with a nasty ear infection that was so painful you were in tears and then ended up also having a NASTY viral infection that caused you to have a 105 degree fever on Wednesday that did not drop below 103 degrees for about 15 hours despite my best efforts. You have also been coughing until you vomit. If it sounds like you are utterly pitiful, it's because you are! I have never seen eyes on a child that were so red rimmed or pitiful. In addition to the restless nights I've had with you this week,your brothers and sisters have been fairly restless too. As a matter of fact, I am holding Westin right now since he seems unable take a nap any other way. I pray that your virus does not spread to the masses, but I fear the goopy eyes and low grade fevers are a sign that it already has (sigh).

While your unreasonable behavior is making me CRAZY, I do enjoy the snuggles I get when you do want to sit still and rest. I am so grateful that you chose this week to get so sick since you demanded my constant and undivided attention. At least we had grandparents, aunts and an uncle to help take care of babies when you would not allow me to touch any of them. (I'm not sure everyone else appreciated you getting sick this week, but they were very nice to help :) As you enter your sixth straight day of fever, you are beginning to act like you feel a little better and I am beginning to see the Jackson that I enjoy emerging. Please get well and stay well for a LONG time!!! And if all the babies get as sick as you this week, please go easy on me because it will be quite the week! God bless you sweet boy.

With all my love,
Mommy